Thoughts
Current mood: Shattered
I’m so shattered, I don’t even know where to begin. One more place to write in, the dream blog, I started up today in which I am supposed to write what I dream during the night (if I feel like it). But there are so many places that I can write in, I don’t know where the best place is sometimes. Here, or my personal diary files, och perhaps the diary at qruiser.com (swedish gay community).
I think there’s a reason for this shatteredness (is that a word?). And that is the fact that I haven’t been very careful. By careful I mean taking care of myself such as eating right, sleeping and.. Taking my meds. It’s not intentional, but if you skip a few doses here and there, I guess it eventually starts to show. I feel somewhat restless, and it’s hard to gather any thoughts. The fact that I’m alone right now, and in use of company doesn’t help.
Everything I write seems pointless, and I’m writing about a word a minute now. My brain works slowly and my head feels empty. That’s schizophrenia for ya. Well, a few of the symptoms anyway. But I will take my medicine from now on, it’s just that I tend to get in these little dips, when I don’t care or put taking the medicine off and then forget it altogether. But I will stop writing now before it gets too long drawn.
//Syntium
